


Promises: the kept and unkept

by orphan_account



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hospital, Broken Promises, Death, Fluff and Angst, I Am Sorry, I Will Go Down With This Ship, M/M, Moving, Promises, Timeskip, i wrote this at 3am, idk how to tag, mentions of Goshiki, only letters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-25
Updated: 2021-02-25
Packaged: 2021-03-16 16:26:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29703312
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Is there a proper way to say goodbye to someone? Maybe with a letter.Semishira angst here we go!
Relationships: Semi Eita/Shirabu Kenjirou
Comments: 2
Kudos: 8





	Promises: the kept and unkept

**Author's Note:**

> Ok so basically I wrote this in like an hour and it’s a series of letters that tell a story! Enjoy! !read tags!

Dear, love.  
I hope that you get comfy in your knew place. By the time you see this I hope you already landed. Maybe we could video call later and you can show me around the apartment. Oh and if I dare to let you go, you tell me ok? 

I made a promise and if I break that then come and bury me six feet under.  
.  
.  
.  
.  
I still don’t know if this was the right decision, to leave you all alone while you were moving but I don’t think I could go with you.

My heart wouldn’t be able to watch you go in that hospital and get treatment.

I’m a weak and cold person, but at least I moved somewhere similar to me. You know when you get so cold everything goes numb? Yeah that’s how I want to feel always.

I’m sorry for everything.  
I’m sorry for not having the guts to face you.  
I’m sorry if I break your heart sometimes.

I don’t deserve you. 

I think to myself and wonder why I’m I not the one who is punished. 

Why are you the one in constant pain?

Once I read a quote. I don’t remember much about it but I think it goes like 

No matter how far I am from the one I love, they always will be the closest in my heart.

Cute right? But really don’t laugh at me it’s true.

I am truly writing this cause I don’t know if I’ll actually get to say goodbye. I don’t think the words will muster in my mouth or I might lose my voice by saying them too you.

I know this won’t last forever, it’s only a year right? Like the year between your collage and when I was a third year. It’s not going to end and we will be back again. You can come live with me out here in the snow or we can go back to Japan or anything really as long as I am with you.

Now love don’t you go crying because of this. I know you’re a bigger softie then me but come on this is cheesy. 

Well I think I got my point across but I don’t want this letter to end. I want you to continuing reading until surgery and past that. I want you to take this note wherever you go and if you want me to write more I’ll do it. I’ll talk about my new life, the culture around, anything and everything to keep you distracted.

I love you so much that it physically hurts to be apart. (I should probably go to the doctor also.)

You big idiot, call me when you land.

I’ll hurt you badly if you don’t come back next year.

This is goodbye Semi.

-Shirabu

Dear Shirabu,

Hey I know you wanted me to call you about the letter but I wanted to act like I never got it so I could write back, even if it’s been two weeks.

First: you’re not weak, I mean without you I wouldn’t be as far as I am with my treatment or song writing. You really are my lifeline and I know that sounds stupid.

Second: Don’t you go out there and freeze your butt off! If you do that then you’re breaking our promise and I will bury you six feet under, you hear that? Dress warm and layer up! I even packed my favorite pare of gloves since I don’t need them with the hot weather over here.

I would share a quote but I’m not really into poetry so I put some of my favorite songs and some that remind me of you! Also guess who I recently got in contact with! I’ll wait....

Goshiki! Your best friend!  
Next time we video call I’ll show you proof.

It was kind of getting lonely by myself, you know? I’m not really like you, where I enjoy being alone all the time. Don’t get me wrong! Peace and quiet is nice but it was so quiet my ears started ringing.

Don’t be mean to Goshiki he is still as nice as ever. Maybe we can try playing volleyball again cause he still does.

Don’t forget the songs below 

-love, Semi 

You know what you don’t deserve no ‘dear love/Semi’

I really got sad since I thought you didn’t get my goodbye note and you pull your own letter on me?!? And you started talking to the bowl cut brat. What is the hot weather doing to you? You should finish treatment early and come by so we can watch the fresh snow fall and drink hot coco. It might not sound romantic to you but jut having you be around is romantic itself.

I listened to the songs you put in your letter. Some of those I remember cause every time I came over you would play a few or hum the toons. The singing voices on some of the artists were great but I would prefer a recording of you singing or humming anything. 

I’ve being having trouble sleeping lately and I have tried everything in the book. 

Don’t eat before you got to bed  
Drink more water  
Have tea with honey

I even tried some stupid sleeping pills but nothing works. I realized that I didn’t have this problem before because I was with you. So as you can see I really need that recording so I can function.

It’s like I have an addiction to you and if I don’t get enough I’ll go insane.

Basically I’m saying I miss you. I miss you so fucking much Semi. I know we have six more months but I don’t know how long I can wait.

In my letter before I said I don’t know if I made the right decision but now I know 

I made the wrong one.

You’re probably laughing at how desperate I sound but maybe it’s cause I’m sleep deprived.

I can’t wait to see you again, idiot Semi.

Dear Shirabu,

Hey I finally sent the recording and I’m glad you liked it and you’re sleeping peacefully. 

I am currently writing this since you are ignoring my calls, meanie. 

Oh and just so you know I am still hanging out with Goshiki cause he is cool and he is helping me workout and stay healthy so that’s great!

I was thinking about working on a new song, like better then any song I have written before! I want it to be about us! Like it will be about our relationship over this year and when it goes viral I’ll use the money so we can go on tour or something!

On the other hand I have a treatment update. It’s been hard but the doctors are saying I am making progress and everything has been going according to plan. The whole hospital visits have their ups and downs but I did make friends with the nurses and some of the patients around me. Someone even gave me a shark tooth from the ocean! I don’t go there cause it’s kind of far from the apartment and hospital but it was definitely a nice gift.

Now I must go back to spamming you with calls.

Talk to you in a bit! Bye bye!

-Semi.

...

Dear Shirabu,

I’m scared. I don’t know what’s happening over there with you put why haven’t you contacted me?

Are you breaking our promise? It’s been a month since our last call and I feel like it’s all crashing.

I had to rewrite this letter twice since a kept messing up with my cloudy vision and spilt tears. 

I really want you to read this and send something back or just text me! 

You always say I’m the idiot but you’re the one I have to bury since you won’t reply! I thought we would get threw this together! 

I thought you loved and cared about me the way I do for you!

At this point my wrist is cramping up by how fast and hard I am writing 

Shirabu please

Respond and let me know you’re ok

Give me some sort of hope.

-Semi

Dear Shirabu,

I didn’t think that when you said goodbye in the first letter you actually meant forever.

You bastard! Going and getting hurt and freezing out in the cold.

I remember how I first got the call only a few days after I sent the letter. I really thought you fell out of love or decided you were done with me.

I thought the whole thing of you dying was some prank. I just couldn’t believe it.

Now look at me, my treatments all done and I’m packing for a flight to you. I get to see you one more time.

But at least I get to actually bury you six feet under that’s a promise you kept.

It’s hard without you Shirabu. I saved recordings, photos, voicemails, the letters and anything of yours I had.

I don’t know if I can let this go. It all happened so quickly right?

It all seems like one big cliche and when I wake up I’ll get another weekly phone call with you.

I really don’t know what to write.

Oh I finish the song a while ago and I planned on making a video for you but now I can’t even hear the song without sobbing. 

If this is love Shirabu, then I hope to never love again. 

I miss you and I’m sorry I couldn’t tell you I love you one more time.

In the afterlife don’t forget me, ok?

Goodbye my love.

-Semi

**Author's Note:**

> Yayyyyy thank you for reading! And if you would like me to write more of these with different ships I literally will!! Have a great day/night/evening! ^ ^


End file.
